Trusting God in the Waiting Room
I think one of the hardest things I have ever faced in life is trusting God in the waiting room. Can you relate? I'm not just talking about a doctor's waiting room--and sometimes those can be pretty scary places--but God's waiting room. I've spent a lot of time in that place. Memorized the wall paper. Never had my watch set to His timing. Often thought He should call my name before somebody else's. Always fought impatience when I would knock on the door and get the receptionist (metaphorically speaking) or another "wait" response.
In the hallway, I could have picked a different path. Lots of closed doors line the hallway, but it doesn't take much to open them. And when that waiting room gets frustrating, it sure is tempting to take a chance on door number two or three or four.
Don't we just long for God to answer, to grant a desire--perhaps a desire we've waited on for years and years? (Twenty years of waiting for a publisher to say yes, comes to mind.) But there are other times in life when maybe we're waiting for a loved one to return. Or news from the doctor, hoping that it's good. Or a career to take off, when it seems impossible. Or someone to just want us, to love us, to hold us close.
Have you been there? I have. In many different ways and in ways other than this, but trusting God sometimes is just plain hard.
I was asked once to define faith. I've thought about that on and off ever since, and then I found these words that I'd written down long ago. I can't recall if they are my words or a quote from someone else, but they seemed to sum up faith rather well. And faith is what holds us close to God's heart. It is faith that allows us to please Him, because we believe that He exists and that He rewards those who diligently seek Him.
We might not know what's going to happen around the next bend because we're still counting the flowers on the waiting room wall. But we do not want to leave that room and test our fate on those other hallway doors. Taking that path isn't trust. And faith is trusting God even when we don't know what the future holds because we don't have enough evidence yet. We can't know everything because we don't have all knowledge. So there comes a point when we have to decide--do I trust God even if I can't see the outcome? Because I just don't have the power to see beyond today?
Truth is, it's my daily struggle for a woman who likes to know and sometimes (don't tell) even thinks she has control. (She doesn't.)
How about you? Do you have enough faith to trust God even when your questions can't be answered yet?
May God give us faith to keep watching, to keep trusting, even when it seems like there are no visible answers yet.