June 2009

Yesterday, I spent the day cleaning, then took a break to chat with a dear friend on the phone. Then Randy and I went out to dinner with friends in the evening to celebrate another dear friend’s birthday (a bit late) then came back to our house for dessert (cannolis – yum!) With the boys’ move to California coming in August, the house was, shall we say, a bit messy? Actually, disaster would be a better word! But we managed to get the clutter reduced and the floors vacuumed. If only I could keep it this nice all the time! The sorting for packing has begun again though, so the clutter is filling up the family room floor once more.

Plans for the move have been coming along, and I have been helping where I can. The thought of them living so far away…I’ll admit it…separation anxiety is starting to kick in. Especially at night. I don’t know if it was the fact that we ate so late last night or my troubled thoughts, but I had the strangest dreams! In one dream, I kept seeing bugs in the coffee grounds in the two new bags I just bought. Very weird…fortunately, it was just a dream, and I did not drink bugs this morning!

In the midst of my separation anxiety, I’ve been most grateful to the Lord for allowing me to have a career to keep me busy for (hopefully) years to come. I love what I do – I’ve loved every bit of being a wife and mom, and now I love the process of writing books! I’ve had some wonderful letters from readers this past week who have had such kind things to say about Michal. Then today in church two friends stopped me to talk about Michal, telling me how much they enjoyed the story. I am honored and humbled, and I truly appreciate it when people let me know their thoughts – especially the nice ones! Most of all, I am thrilled to know the book is inspiring readers to dig into the Scripture and see if I came close to getting Michal’s story right. :)

The end of July I will be getting my line edits (galleys) for Abigail. Up until now, only two people have read Abigail that I know of. My acquisitions editor and my dear friend and critique partner, Jill Stengl. So I’m anxious to know what my in-house editor and others think of the story. I love it and can’t wait to dig into the edits.

In the meantime, I finished a first draft of Bathsheba this week. I had typed “the end” a week or so ago but decided it needed a few more scenes. Of course, the extra scenes bumped up my word count and I have to cut 10k words before it is ready. I’ve cut probably 700 or so today, but it’s been slow going because so far I haven’t run across whole scenes that need deleting. But I’m only 1/3 of the way through rereading the book and this is more of a cursory read. I’m sure I will find more to fix as time passes. It’s the first time I’ve written out Bathsheba’s story like this and I am loving the read! I feel like I am finally understanding who she is/was and what her life might have been like. And once this trilogy is finished, I will finally have my long-ago dream – to read a complete biblical novel on David’s life. Having the trilogy surround his wives has made his story even better, to my way of thinking.

Of course, biblical fiction is still fiction, and though I spend time trying to understand motives behind the actions of these people, only God (and those people) truly know their own hearts and minds. I hope my speculation rings true and comes close to the possibility, but this side of heaven, we will never know for sure.

Still, I love the process, love how it forces me to dig deeper into God’s Word, to read more than just the Scriptures surrounding the story – to read the whole counsel of God and try to get a better grip on what life was like then. I wish I could time-travel and observe the whole scenario like on a movie screen. I know there have been movies done on David’s life, but there has never been a period piece done on him that meets my satisfaction. Perhaps I am too picky. But I would love to see The Wives of King David played out on the big screen. Or…someone could invent me a time machine and I’ll just go back and see the real thing. :)

I wonder if God will let us do that in heaven someday? I’m betting it will be better than Blu-ray. :) And when you think about it, God put those stories in Scripture for a reason, so who knows? If nothing else, I have plenty of questions I want to ask David, Michal, Abigail, and Bathsheba someday.

In the meantime, I’ll stick to the Scriptures and books on culture and other types of research. For a list of books I’ve used in studying Michal you can find it on The Wives of King David Website Bonus Features. Perhaps the resources will spark your own research!

Shalom~

I’ve been doing a lot of reading – but then again, I can almost always be found carrying a book around, catching snatches of story at every possible moment. So I’ve managed to finish quite a few lately. Two of them I’ll wait to recommend because I have Spotlight interviews scheduled with their authors. In July, I will interview James Scott Bell, who has made me a fan with his page-turning suspense. Watch for his interview July 1. The next book is Ginger Garrett’s latest release, but more on that later as well. Ginger is scheduled for an interview in August.

In the meantime, these books recently left my to-be-read (TBR) pile and joined my to-be-shared-and-recommended (TBSARP?…hmm…) pile.

The first is Havah, The Story of Eve by Tosca Lee. Wonderful, imaginative retelling of the story of the first created woman. The author has done a remarkable job of weaving what might have been. Provocative – made me consider things in a way I hadn’t done before.

The next book is a quick read – Dear Baby Girl by author Jane Orcutt. The story reminded me of the movie Juno, the Academy Award Winning film for original screen play. Dear Baby Girl kept me turning pages and the ending was both expected and unpredictable. A moving story!

The last recommendation in this list is A Bride in the Bargain by author Deeanne Gist. I’ve read Deeanne’s work before and enjoyed each book. This one is among her best! Fast-paced romance that I couldn’t wait to finish and didn’t want to end!

I’m cleaning out my bookshelves and hope to donate some boxes to worthy causes so I can fill them up again with more great stories that I’m longing to read. I whittle my TBR pile down and it just keeps growing again! But that’s OK. I love supporting my fellow Christian authors. :) (I hope you will too!)

Speaking of which, I am currently reading Roxanne Henke’s On A Someday. This one caught my attention at the prologue. I did a double take when I read the first scene because it felt like Roxy must have been listening in on my life! :) (She wasn’t.) But the story is definitely realistic. So far, an enjoyable intriguing read.

Selah~

My grandpa (on my mom’s side) only lived into his 60s. He died of pneumonia after suffering a stroke when I was three, so my memories of him are sketchy at best. There is a vague image of him sitting on his front porch smoking a cigar or pipe on some long ago day, and I have pictures that allow me to know him better in my imagination. When I was young, my grandma (his widow) used to babysit me, and I would dig out those pictures and ask her to tell me about them. Funny how young my grandparents once were! Maybe their history will end up in a book someday. :)

My grandpa on my dad’s side lived into his mid-70s. He died six months after his wife, my grandma, so I lost them both close together. I didn’t know either one of my dad’s folks very well, though because they lived in California, and I only saw them every few years throughout my life. I loved the excuse to travel out west to see them, probably because I loved to travel and also because I was intrigued with the thought of having cousins. (All of my dad’s family lived in CA.) In Michigan I had two female cousins, but they weren’t that close in age. But that’s another story…

Randy’s family has greater longevity than mine. His grandmother (on his mom’s side) and her sisters lived well into their nineties. Randy’s dad, on the other hand, seemed to come from less hardy stock. Somehow, though, his dad managed to be the healthiest of the lot and lived to be 96! Our children new their grandpa far longer than I knew either of mine.

As a kid, I used to fear losing my parents. I never expected to come to this place to have both parents in their mid-80s. It’s a blessing for which I’m most grateful. My dad has now told me that he wants to live to be 90. Perhaps he shall. Only God knows.

Yesterday, as we gathered at the nursing home to visit my dad to celebrate Father’s Day, a wave of emotion, a mixture of tears and joy filled his expression. He is always so grateful to see his family! And I thank God for one more Father’s Day, for one more week, for one more day to tell him I love him. To look at his aged face, to see the mottled skin and the wrinkles, the weakness where once there was strength. To understand his inability to care for his own needs – the wheelchair testifying to that fact – and to have to repeat myself and talk louder so he can hear me better. To have to show him how to do things (like work a remote for his TV) that a younger man could do with ease. But to see his happiness when he realized the new TV was his. To bring his favorite treats of pie and ice cream because he still enjoys his desserts as much as he ever did. To show him in such simple ways that we love him.

I’ve always been proud of my dad for his walk with the Lord, for the example he has always been to me, for his listening ear. And I thank God for him, for his life – not only what it was but what it is now. Even though it’s not the way I wish it could be, his life is still precious. And I am blessed.

Selah~

Some years you just know are going to be different. Maybe it’s the scent in the air or a feeling deep in your bones, but you know somehow things are changing. Sometimes for the better, sometimes not so much…

Of course, a lot of how we live with changes, whether we like them or not, depends on our attitude. We can dig in our heels and have to be dragged through the upheavals or we can put on our running shoes and take it all in stride. I’ve done a bit of both, depending on the circumstances. Right now, I’ve been searching for those shoes.

I guess you could say my life has been changing for a few years now, ever since I worked myself out of a job homeschooling my kids. Twelve years of hard work (and joy) had ended – so now what do I do? I stood at the crossroads of change.

By the following year, my life had taken a new direction. A fledgling writing career had begun, my family was nearby busily pursuing their own goals and dreams, each day was fresh and new. Then 2008 hit and my dad fell and broke a hip. If you’ve read my blog long enough, you know the struggles of that time. Life has not been the same for any of us since. Our new normal is a weekly adjustment.

We entered 2009 with that new normal intact, and the excitement of my first book hitting the shelves. God had given me a future and a hope and a job I hope to keep for years to come!

In the background of my life, my kids were still pursuing their own goals and dreams. Talk emerged of moving out west, and at first I hoped it was just talk. But as time passed, it became clear the talk was real, the plans moving ever forward in that direction.

In April, our middle son took a temporary job in New York, the opposite direction of where they wanted to be, but the work was good and seemed to be where God was leading. The adjustment to having one son gone was hard in some ways, but manageable in others. I think the temporary part helped. God was giving us time to accept the change.

As the job is nearing its end, however, the opportunity to head to California has finally come. When he returns home in July, he and his older brother will pack their things and head to the land of sunshine and palm trees, many miles from here. To live. For probably a very long time.

Of course, no one knows the future and God could bring them back here again someday. Or, He could move us out to join them. Or anything in between. It’s a change that’s been in the making and we are excited to see what God has in store for them.

If you know my sons and have ever watched them on a film set directing a video or short film, then you have seen them come alive in a way nothing else has ever done. After years of watching them tinker with the home video camera and write stories and learn the ins and outs of film making, you can just sense that God wired them to do this work. What He does with their efforts is up to Him. But they have to be about the business of seeking to do His will.

Even if that means they have to move clear across the country…

Sometimes changes don’t come easily. Sometimes Cinderella’s clock strikes midnight and the time with her, with them, is gone. It’s coming far too quickly now, so I’m storing up hugs for future memories and planning to earn many travel miles. Skype and web cams help a lot – it’s already like our son in NY is in the room with us when we chat. When he strums his guitar, the sound carries through the house as though he is in the next room. Technology makes saying goodbye a lot easier.

But that won’t stop the missing them. That storage of hugs won’t last very long – especially since I’m a person who longs for that physical touch. Oh phooey – now I’m getting emotional…

Still, changes will come to us, sometimes daily, whether we want them to come or not. In the past, I would balk and resist such a huge upheaval, such a vast change to all that I know. But perhaps time has mellowed my thinking. That and the realization that this life is not permanent. Someday we will be together again for always. Even now we will always be close at heart. And when that distance separates us, coming far faster than I’d planned, we have Skype and the Internet and cell phones.

And a new adventure awaiting us all…

Selah~

I started a new diet this week. I hate that word. Diet. The cliches tell you it means “Die” with a “T” or “Dare I Eat This?” Of course, that is because in most diets you feel as though you are starving to death, and you must ask yourself if you dare let that next food item past your lips!

Of course, diet actually just means what you eat in a given day. What does your diet consist of? Do you eat a healthy diet or one made of junk food? So many ways to apply that word. So I guess I really shouldn’t hate those four letters. It is just a word, after all. A four-letter word, yes, but a word nonetheless.

True confessions here. I’ve struggled with weight issues most of my life. Came from being overweight as a child, I guess. Then in my teens I went on a diet I would never repeat. True story – I ate dry Cream of Wheat for the first few days. Then I counted calories, once or twice keeping them as low as 600, but usually around 1000-1200 a day. I wasn’t anorexic because I stopped when I reached my goal. But I was determined to reach that goal and made my stomach obey my desires. (A little too well, I must say and I would not recommend anything under 1000 calories to anyone!)

And…I never want to count calories like that again! I avoided most diets for years after that, though I did manage to keep my weight manageable.

I have tried other diets since – of the 5-20 pound loss variety. In one, I gave up all fat for weeks. I saw this diet ad suggesting we give up fat for a day. So I figured, why not a week or a month? My body did not like going without fat that long and soon told me so! (I do not admit to being a nutritionist, but I now understand just how stupid that was!)

Another time I gave up any and all forms of sugar for three weeks. Even fruit. I was dying for an apple at the end of that time – something sweet! I lost more than I expected, and you would think that would be a good incentive to use the diet again, but I can’t bring myself to give up chocolate or fruit!

Did I mention that I hate the word diet?

Well, whether I like the word or not, I’ve come to realize that it does matter what I eat. The discovery came when I ate breakfast and then did not feel good. Weeks went by, and I would wake up with energy and feel fine, then eat food and drink my tea and feel yucky for the next few hours. So I realized it was time to do some experimenting. What was I eating that could cause this? The elimination process has begun with eggs and gluten.

So I’m eating rice flour substitutes and made my favorite chocolate muffins with oat and rice flour instead of wheat. For the egg, I mixed tapioca starch with water (according to a recipe book) and then put the ingredients together and popped them in the oven. They sank in the middle as they baked, but they tasted really good! They came out as blobs, no form or much shape to them – crumbs mostly. But the best muffin crumbs I’ve ever had.

Then yesterday I fried perch for my family using Bisquick and dipped in egg. For me, I left off the egg and used a gluten-free baking mix. I figured, perch is healthy – this is good. But I’ve noticed something strange this week. Instead of losing weight, I gained a few pounds. Of course, the ice cream I had the other night (cheating) could attest for it, but still…

I discovered that one can actually gain weight on a diet. Since I lost 18 pounds on my sugar-free diet, I figured a gluten-free, egg-free one might be similar. Um…not so far. This is most unfortunate, as it means I may have to increase my exercise or decrease my calories or both.

Did I mention I hate the word exercise?

(I feel better this week though, so perhaps there is something to this diet thing – as in are you eating a healthy one?)